Being Straightforward

Following up to the apology message, Marina added me on facebook the next night. Having her on my list enabled me to view her photos that she had posted. I could tell that her values were not exactly a match with mine. She seems to have come from a very rich family, private schools, studying abroad, nice cloth and expensive outings. I told this situation to the older sister from church who were also present during the conversation. She began to wonder why she hadn't been added on facebook yet, because she was the first one to write down her information for Marina on Sunday. After I told her about my apology message to Marina, I got an earful from this sister. She made me realize what a big mistake it was to send that message. It could've been easily seen as an "initiative" that I was showing interest in her. She told me, to a girl who's fond of you, even a simplest grin could have been taken as a sign of good will.

30 minutes later Marina sent her reply to my apology message. It was loaded with hearts and smilies. She was REALLY straightforward. She gave me all her contact information and told me where about she works. She hopes to have coffee or tea with me after work at 5:30pm sometimes.

After that, I told the sister in Christ, Meimei about the reply. But I couldn't hear anything she said, all I could hear was my pounding heart. My pupils widened as the possible consequences of my message flashed before my eyes.

She was not a Christian to me, because no christian girls that I knew took this direct approach. If our guidelines don't apply, but I could only face her with the one way I've always known - with honesty and sincerity. I replied on facebook, "We need to talk", just one sentence.

We started to play tag online the next day when her work suddenly became busy and my school schedule became almost impossible to live through. Finally yesterday we caught each other online. I didn't give her my cellphone information because I knew I cannot control that method of communication once it started to go.

I believed that she has the same personality like I do. She knows what she wants and she's not afraid to go for it. So I re-payed her straightforwardeness with my own. I shared with her how I remembered her from before and what was going through my mind on Sunday. More so, I shared with her my values in life and in relationships. I could offer her nothing more than friendship to her at the moment. She was speechless after that, but didn't show distaste. I was able to unload this boulder from my heart. She does have the same personality as me, just not that experienced in life yet.

From left: Leah's boyfriend Tomo, Marina, Leah and... Steve (unrelated)
At back, crazy New Zealander going at it. (still unrelated)

Later on yesterday night, Leah also confirmed the add on facebook. Leah has been a long time friend of Marina since their college days in Western Michigan, also the one who brought her to church. I've known Leah right since the time that I started coming to New Hope Tokyo Church. We spent a while talking online about the situation. Leah was relieved that I took the direct approach and be extremely upfront with Marina. She said that Marina can be a bit dense sometimes, not sensitive to the regular of social cues. Leah also mentioned that Marina was brought up in a very wealthy environment so it might be a little difficult for her to give materialistic things up. I felt very glad that I directly told her that I am a poor student with nothing to offer. :P

Leah later saw some pictures from my fellowship and she was very eager to join us. She already knows a lot of the people from the fellowship. She also mentioned that Marina has been eager to join a fellowship as well. I promised to forward the upcoming fellowship details to her and leave Marina in her hands. As for me, I am well protected (and restrained) by my dear sisters in Christ. Another dramatic chapter of my crazy life in Japan can be put to corner of my mind for now. Praise God for all His wonders. It's also time for me to show more restrain in these things.